Archive for February 2013
Ch. 4: Code Four Communication-Selfishness v. Listening to Understand
Selfishness vs. Listen with the Desire To Understand This last communication killer is so common it’s actually part of our culture. We’re encouraged to look out for ourselves, to be self-focused. We’re also naturally inclined to respond to our own desires, feelings, and whims. We’ve been doing it since we could breathe. Maturity comes when…
Read MoreCh 4: Code Four Communication: Avoiding Unkindness
Unkindness vs. Setting Speech Boundaries As a law enforcement family, there will always be pressures as we looked at in the first chapter. Unfortunately the easiest place to release that pressure is on those closest to us. And the closer you get, the worse it can be. Because we are so entwined, when our spouses…
Read MoreThe Dash
It’s there on the headstones, barely noticeable. A birth date; a death date. And a little mark in between. The dash – so simple, so seemingly insignificant. Yet it represents a life. It represents relationships. It represents values and words and actions that left a mark on the world. Last week I attended a memorial…
Read MoreCh 4: Code Four Communication: Unforgiveness kills communication
Unforgiveness vs. Keeping Short Account When our unspoken expectations are not met, it is very easy to develop resentment. We take it personally. It’s an affront! But that really isn’t fair, is it? How can our husbands know they did something wrong if they don’t know the rules? Years ago when Brent was working swing…
Read MoreCh 4: Code Four Communication: It takes time
Go Easy; It Takes Time I once heard a couple who had been married for over forty years say, “We didn’t really get each other until we’d gotten the first twenty years out of the way.” Now that Brent and I have been married over twenty-three years, I understand what they were talking about. Entwining…
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