Chp 10: Little Future Cops – Being a kid of a cop

Our three boys grew up knowing the risks. We never lied to them about it, but it wasn’t what we talked about at the dinner table either. But what they also knew was that if Mom or Dad died doing the job, we’d go out with a sense of pride, purpose, and loving what it…

Read More

Chp 9: Silver Bullets-Money & Your Marriage-How to talk

Money Talks Ted and Sarah have difficulty talking about money, as it is a constant source of conflict. Ted gets frustrated that he works hard to bring in the money and they never seem to get ahead. Sarah naturally avoids conflict, so she inadvertently sabotages their efforts by not communicating with Ted about upcoming bills.…

Read More

Chp 9: Silver Bullets: Money and Your Marriage

  “Don’t even consider keeping up with the Joneses. THEY’RE BROKE!” “The number one cause of divorce in North America is stress due to money problems.” Dave Ramsey, financial advisor It’s no secret. Across the country and beyond, we’re vulnerable to economic trends. Why? Because, for most of us, we are dependent upon other people’s…

Read More

Chp 8: Stuff Happens. When Hard Times Come

It isn’t a matter of if, it’s a matter of when. Stress can create police marriage problems but you can be prepared. Because my husband has PTSD from his deployment to Iraq, the Fourth of July is now about renting loud movies, closing all the windows and blinds or praying that he gets called into…

Read More

Chp 6: Short v. Long Term Thinking-Emotional Baggage

When I Moved In, I Brought My Baggage Jim and Angie sat across from us, their meals barely touched. They recounted an issue that they couldn’t get past in their marriage, and it was huge. They were so concerned that they brought it to Brent and I, their mentors, to help them sort it out.…

Read More

Chp 6: Thick Skin, Soft Heart: How To Deal Emotionally

I don’t wear the badge on a uniform. But when you’re married to an officer, you wear the shadow of their badge on your heart. Pat, wife of a CHP officer who was injured on-duty Worrying is carrying tomorrow’s load with today’s strength—carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time.…

Read More

Chp 5: Game Face, His Coping Mechanisms

His Coping Mechanisms Your cop will have his ways to deal with stress. You may not be crazy about some of them, but, if it’s working, you need to let it go. A couple of years ago, Brent had a chief who dealt with stress by having an occasional outdoor cigar-smoking session with a few…

Read More